Meet Bob, and no Bob doesn’t have bitch Tits.

Let me tell you about my friend Bob, ofcourse Bob being the fictional name. I’m not just going out and say I’m ranting about Abeer Mohammad, like, that wouldn’t be nice of me.

I’ve known Bob for a long time now, Bob was the little bugger in the pack who always had an opinion about everything, but it was all under control. I like to think his otherwise polite nature, his bass guitar and helping attitude kept critiques at bay.

But then,well almost suddenly Bob changed! On a  pretty random Wednesday in his sacred place ( no not that sacred place, I mean the gaming arena ) Bob exploded. Which was the first of many explosions…

Bob started off with how sick he was of everyone playing a shitty strategy and how hard he tried to beat the sentinal and finally how everything thought it was just a game. I think everyone was quiet for the first time. Every one thought about how Bob( without the bitch tits ) actually had a point. Life became normal once again. Then the real episodes started when Bob flared up on some technology conversation. Then the poor kids on World Of Warcraft started from Bob’s wrath ( well atleast we were safe ). Then there was the incident involving Bob and the Rs.5 more expensive bottle of cola, thats when things started getting bad.

Bob was now bitching about everything, from not liking how lame movies were getting to why no one was on the raid when he said so. Every one was concerned ,few recommended therapy, some had more drastic Ideas of getting him laid with, well, lets not discuss that. But people were thinking, then every one focused more on  why was Bob doing what he was doing. And how did the humble monk turn into the vicious hunk ( no not the one from Incredible Hulk , but the evil one from Team America’s movies )

Suggestions included his beloved maid running off and getting married while he watched to Bob starting on sex change medications ( not horny goat weed , I’m talking about the stuff that makes your dick fall off  ) . Some suggested possession by his WoW charecter ‘Maulvi’ and the less creative ones fled to the incident when Bashir cut his balls off and ofcourse then there was the talk of his PMS problems. But this wasn’t helping Bob in any way, it was getting worse and worse.

One day everyone thought to confront Bob, and everyone came with all the conventional banners and how they wanted to see Bob ok. And how they missed the old Bob ( no, even that one didn’t have bitch tits, what is up with you? ) It was much more deeper than that … “Bob was afraid of flashing lights!”

Seriously thats it, no incest, no drugs or whatever. End , finito, you hear me ?


Published by

Fahim Akhter

Fahim is a product manager with over 10 years of experience currently working as product head at MONT5. He focuses on user centric centric design, especially on brand, user experience and revenue product challenges. Prior to joining MONT5, Fahim's has worn multiple hats during his career from game production to product development but the emphasis has always been on creating unparalleled user experience and to help startups to make complex products more engaging. He has worked on diversified portfolio of startups including games, apps, education and e-commerce with product reach of 10M users across the globe. Fahim is a computer science graduate from FAST Islamabad. He volunteers for education and mentors students and startups, to help them grow and drive innovation.

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